This is the first book for all those women who know they're too nice, who recognize somewhere deep inside that overdoing for others leaves nothing for them. In her typically humorous, entertaining style, psychotherapist Karen R. Koenig shows how women are brought up and expected to be nice, and how that limits their options, cookie-cutters their personalities, and catapults them headfirst in the Hagen-Dazs. Every chapter speaks to niceness that is unhealthy in its extreme, including the pitfalls of perfectionism, the hazards of food as self-care, the downside of doing everything yourself, and the perils of having your needle permanently stuck in the yes groove. Along the way, readers will learn the life skills and self-care strategies needed to create a happy, fulfilling, successful life and stop abusing food.

• Try the “Grab Your Thinking Cap” exercises to understand why you might be finding fulfillment inside the fridge instead in of in other aspects of your life.
• Use the “Nice Girl Recoery Tips” to learn practical strategies for saying no and putting yourself first.
• Read the “Meet one of the Nice Girls” vignettes that tell the stories of aspiring “saints” who are learning to toss away their halos and stop abusing food and their bodies.

Table of Contents:

Introduction: Nice Girls—Read This: How is Being Nice a Vice?

1 – What’s a “Nice” Girl?
      Sugar and Spice and Everything….Fattening?

2 – Doesn’t Everyone’s Best Friend Live in Her Refrigerator?
      Using Food as Self-Care

3 – If It Doesn’t Have Frosting, What Good is It?
      Finding Substitutes to Eating

4 – I Am Women, Hear Me Chew!
      Taking Care of Family

5 – Go Cry on Your Own Shoulders!
      Taking Care of Friends

6 – Do I Look Like Santa’s Helper?
      Taking Care at Work

7 – What Part of “NO” Don’t You Understand?
      Saying What You Mean

8 – Can I Be Perfectly Imperfect?
      Overcoming Perfectionism

9 – Please Please Me, Oh Yeah!
      People Pleasing

10 – Me, Me, Me, Me, Me…Just Practicing!
      Learning to be Selfish

11 – Look at Me…I’m at the Head of the Line!
      Finish First, Not Fat

About the Author:

Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, M.Ed, is a cognitive-behavioral therapist, a national speaker, and the author of three books on eating and weight.